My momma said there'd be days like this

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It's been swirling in my heart lately.  A black cloud of disappointment.  And I don't know why.  And even after I pleaded God's mercies to put feet to my prayers.  Silence.  

"Stay here.  Stay near."

I have to wonder if that is how the children of Israel felt, when they struck out in obedience and didn't know what the next day would hold.  What they had just witnessed was a huge miracle of the waters parting by the very breath of God.  

Their true deliverance from their slavery, their oppressive bondage, had just exploded behind them.  Then their dreams of freedom fell flat upon the banks of the other side, days after their dusty dance across the Red Sea.

From their perspective they were clinging to what the hope words of their leader Moses, lead by the hand of God.  Doubts and despair soon settled into their hearts and mind.  The grumbles and groans were heard by many, and by the Most Holy ears.  It's so true that negative speech spreads quicker than one positive word.

Sometimes, we don't see our ways to freedom when we are surrounded by the enemy's shadows of doubt.  I have to wonder if there wasn't one person who thought deliverance into God's hope-filled promise would have looked a little different or a little grander at the time.

Surely there was one doubter among the clan.  Just one or two?

I have come to understand in our journey of faith, when we trust and obey what God has asked us to do, the enemy is lurking at our thresholds throwing stones of doubt our way to test our hope-resolve and builds barriers that cause us to stumble along the way.

That's where God's promises ring true and faithful.  My momma told me there would be days like this.  I've had to go back to what I know and re-establish my hope-filled promise that God originally gave me that fuels my dream.  I have to go back to my "why".   

Every dream is fueled by a personal festering of a "why-I-do-this".  

But....it's supposed to be easy or come more natural ...right?  And of course, it will look exactly what we think it should!  I have found out these are crafty statements the enemy hisses at you to make you give up when the going gets tough.  Or when it feels like you are the only one who cares about your dreams.   

Oh our wayward minds, we're so silly when we try to put our finite understanding, on God's incredible and infinite mind.  His will is unmovable when it comes to His plans for us.  He's got that all planned out fabulously fine without our measly little details we try to add to it.  He doesn't need our input.

The Israelites didn't see their freedom until God took them a few more legs into their journey of trust.

There are days when my faith journey looks the same doubt-filled path.  Did I do the right thing?  Did I strike out at the right time?  Did I really hear from God right?

My obedience tells me yes.  Obedience at any and every time is right when you are following God.  So in those days when I question my motives I remind myself of my why and that gives me a renewed hope. I feel better prepared now.  I have learned that true hope delights our Father. Disappointment rips away at our faith, so cling to what you know about God, and there you will find your true hope. 

Hebrews 10:23  "Let us hold tightly without wavering to the hope we affirm, for God can be trusted to keep his promise." (NLT)

In His affection for you, you have His security. All is not lost, but only continuing. Hold to His words for everything else shifts and changes, but His word is firm. It is a rock that shall not be moved and is my firm place to stand. Live in the hope that we have in Christ and it will bring joy to your heart, enough to occupy your worrisome thoughts. Our Father's hope and love keeps us in His peace and rest.

Romans 5:5 "And this hope will not lead to disappointment. For we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love."  (NLT)