Monday, February 8, 2010

Rain, Trains, and Growing Pains.

Do you know it's been raining/cloudy/snowy in Oklahoma now for too many days? Yeah, it's starting to get to me. I wish we could see the sun shine again. Do gray days affect you too?

As for trains, the last few days I have been "held up" by the trains that cross my path. You know that when they intersect your drive, you HAVE to wait on them. Patience is key, you can't hurry trains. Such is life, sometimes you are faced with situations in which you just have to be patient and wait on God's answer, His best, or His plan to work in your life.

And then there are the growing pains. They hurt don't they. I have been dealing with a particular growing pain of faith recently. God brought to my attention that I needed to surrender something that was waaaayyyyy toooooo important to me. The problem is that I was clinging to the scale's opinion of me. I know it's a little crazy, but it's true. I have been struggling to lose those last few pounds and was weighing myself like an obsessed crazy person and caring too much about the results. (After all I have been traveling this journey for three years now.) And to no avail, no losses. After God's reminder, I dropped my distraction of letting the scale rule my life and just surrendered it to Him. As God does, ever so gently, takes me back into His arms of grace and reminded that He loved me 99lbs ago and one pound wasn't going to change that, one way or the other. (I told you it was a sick obsession, and this is really embarrassing to admit it to you). From now on, the scale is just a tool to measure how much I weigh, nothing else, and it never will be. I have given it up. I will not go back. God loves me that much and there is no need to seek anywhere else. Nothing can change that. I talk about these personal issues in hopes that it helps you realize things that you put in the place of God. I know it doesn't always happen quickly, like a slow moving train, it comes into your life slowly and then all of a sudden, WHAM! there it is. Deal with it, but know this God loves you no matter what. You can turn to Him ALWAYS! Be patient with yourself, and allow God to show His grace and love, lavish in His results. They are always the best and worth waiting for.

Oh by the way, I got weighed on Saturday morning, and as I stepped on the scale, I said to myself, "This is only a tool". Then I looked down and saw that I reached my goal for losing 100 lbs. Yes, it's been three years but indeed the long awaited day had arrived. I praised God for His blessing. He truly has made this possible. Wow...

What have you let get in the way of your relationship with God? How has God been teaching you that He loves you?
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