Saturday, November 20, 2010

My Own Little World

Chaos, it abounds in my little world, so it seems. I'm sure that I don't have an unusually high incidence of crazy-go-wild-nutty circumstances that happen, but for the time being it seems like I am the Queen of Crazy Town. Seriously. It's as if everything is spinning out of control around me. Life can get like that you know....I have often wondered where God is....amidst my chaos.

Recently I took a plane ride, high above land and sea. I saw the intricate patterns of houses lined with curbed streets. There were autumn-colored trees dotting the landscape bordered by perfectly plowed pastures. Winding waters filling the rugged river banks alongside cars traveling on pencil-thin strips of asphalt. Not to mention the high-rise apartment and office buildings interrupting the skyline. The scenes were calm and serene. The snapshots in my mind presented organization. It was life held within the boundaries of engineered structures. The panoramic views belonged on a painter's canvas. God's and man's creations were outlined and defined with strategically interlaced shapes and landscapes. As the shutter clicked in my mind's eye, I captured the seemly peaceful and calm mural displayed over the miles.

I couldn't help but wonder about those living "down there", if their worlds were filled with chaos too. I would guess yes....life is full of it.....in their own little worlds.... full of cancer, trouble, brokenness, hurts, and deaths. Chaos is not regional but worldwide. Are they asking the same questions I am? Where is God in all of this?

As I was praying, I also wondered if these snapshots were God's view of our lives. Every border, outline, highway, and field seemed to keep things in order. But my view, as I see it, assumes disorder. Sometimes peace seems to be the furthest thing from our truth.

Continuing to pray, I felt an odd feeling as I looked out the small pane. That's it!! God's sees our lives in perfect order; I see my life in perfect disarray. I was struck by the noticeable extremes. He sees the big picture.....I see my small, limited, scoped outlook. This so-called crazy town chaos is part of His perfect order for my life. His plan. I know...It doesn't make sense to me either, BUT I was reassured that I was not alone.

If we could see God's view, His perfect order, amidst our chaos and circumstances, which are purposefully designed and ordained, as He intended...then I know it would calm and comfort us and illuminate a deeper understanding of God. With the big wide open view I had, I was reminded that God is in control of things, even my own little chaotic world. I am not alone in this mess, as I tend to think. But with God's perspective of peace, that passes my understanding, then I can take the next step and "fight another day".

God's view of my life, His peace, His reassurance is now ..... is a snapshot I want to frame. My life experiences are really exercises of faith. Journeys to the ultimate destination....Heaven. There have been and will be some hard lessons along the way. There are blessings also as I discover Him working through the difficult circumstances, drawing me near, holding my hand, guiding my actions, teaching me more about Him, and calming me during the times of turbulence. I trust Him as I go forward in my own little world.

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