Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Playing Hide and Seek with God

Ever feel like you are playing a rousing game of hide and seek with God?  I have.  I tend to feel that way when I pray, and pray and then pray some more about certain life issues that are going on around me.  I know that God hears my prayers though, I know He listens, I know He cares.


I have to quiet the evil one when he whispers in my ear that "God doesn't care."  "This is the way your life will always be".  I have to tell him "shhhhhh!".  This just happened the other day in my head.  If you took a long walk in my world you would understand.  There are some things hidden here but believe me when I say, I have been struggling lately with a lot of broken things.  Or maybe it really is like Brent says...that I am just feeling sorry for myself, sometimes I don't know.    


There are a lot of problems that need fixing.  There are a lot of things that can't be fixed, a lot of things that I am waiting to be fixed.  What the issues are don't matter, it's the fact I am dealing with the broken. So when I pray to God to fix the brokenness inside and outside, it seems as if sometimes His silence is deafening.  My natural tendency is to gravitate to the ridiculous lie that God doesn't care.


I know He does.


Sometimes I get frustrated and overwhelmed when I can't fix the raging wrongs that swirl.  When I tell God about it, it's not showing a lack of faith or trust.  It's an admittance that I can't fix.  It's the way I surrender my will, my hurry-up-and-fix-this-broken-garage-now! timing, my messes in his lap.  I can't fix like He can.  When I hear nothing but crickets...I wonder.


I know He hears.


I can trust.  God is faithful.  Some days, it's all I can do just repeat those words in my head.  When I seek God in the hard times, I always find that He is not far away.  He's not playing hide and seek, He's close.  He's there.  Just wait and see...and count to ten.  


Ps. 10:1 O Lord, why do you stand so far away?  Why do you hide when I need you the most.

2 comments:

coachstretch said...

Thanks for sharing your heart Janelle! I often feel the exact same way. God I know you hear me, but it sure feels like I am going at this all alone. I can't do this on my own, help me please. Fix me daddy. I am broken.

Isn't it just like satan to constantly be whispering and throwing lies at us to make us feel incompetent. Constant bombardment...Enough is a enough. Just gotta tell him to shut up! And remind him that we still win!

Thanks again for sharing!

Unknown said...

Appreciate your thoughts. It's hard when you are overwhelmed to not be discouraged. Tears help a lot too.
Thank you for reading.