Thursday, October 9, 2014

Every girls fear she doesn't want you to hear

Psalm 44:21  "God would surely have known it, for He knows the secrets of every heart." (NLT)

There are days I want to just whisper this to myself.  "It's gonna be alright." or "You'll be okay today".  My daughter says I'm a bit of a drama queen.  She might be right about that.  Am I the only one who needs a simple "touch" or a text from a friend?  Perhaps just a message that says "I'm thinking of you?"  

The world we live in wears our hearts thin.  There are days when we just need some silent understanding.  Those days are when I can't help the emotions that rise up in me, I guess I'm a drama queen like that.  

Isn't that how God has designed us to feel?  Feelings and faith, one feeds the other but both are independent of each other.   There are not many outlets for expressing those welled up feelings. 

Many days I've dealt with a lonely and overwhelmed feeling, and strangely when I type these words it feels as if I am whining a bit.  I understand this is normal for a writer.  To top it off, it feels like there is no one to talk to about this.  So I don my fake smile, like you, and say that "I'm okay or I'm doing great."

You may not have the time to unpack my heart, so I'll keep it all in.  Stuff in down deep inside.  We all have a story inside or one that we hide away.  I'm wondering about yours as I try to write mine.  

This is such a personal place for me.

I tend to replay everything.  The good or bad, either and both, all of it, from yesterday, plus day before, projecting feelings, worry, anxiety and stress into my tomorrows.  I give too much and receive too little.  I'm learning to save some for "home."

Can we just pause a moment and say thanks to God for the incredible opportunities He gives us on a daily basis to start new?  Each day He applies His forgetfulness along with His mercy and forgiveness.  Even on the days when we don't feel the comforting strength of Jesus, we know that He's with us, all-knowing to our little secrets we can't speak of.

Oh Lord, we are thankful for your new mercy and strength everyday.  We must get past our past and forget those things that trip us up from going forward.  Clinging to our old hurts only hurts us.  May we invite You into those hurts to heal us and make us whole.

Whether this fits you well or hard, please know that God is working in us.  You see, we not only try to manage our emotions, we try to manage those we love too.   God understands and sees the feelings you tuck deep and those that keep you lonely of heart.

If you know someone who suffers alone, just remind them of how good God is, remind them that whatever it is that weighs them down, it will be okay.  Just love with these words.    

It's gonna be alright, because God made all things right.

You're gonna make it.  God just whispered these secrets and just like the verse says I believe Him for every one of them.  Maybe you found this helpful, if so let me know in the comments.  
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