Friday, October 26, 2012

There's No Way I Am Leaving

My child-like journey of knowing God 
It was in a regular Sunday message where God touched this deep hungry nerve in my heart to know Him more.  It was on that day I had to make a choice to be devoted in my efforts to do so.  If I really wanted it bad enough,  I had to make some changes to make it happen.   

To know more about God, I had to put God as my priority.  

I needed to absorb more truth but also I needed to be a doer of the what the Bible said.  I needed more God in my everyday life.  I needed to stop dancing around church and get into verses that would rejuvenate.   I needed God's power to transform.

He only asks one thing of me.  To make Him first.  To look upon His holy face in relation to the pages of my life.   So I chose God over sleep.  

It's my daily choice to pray, to read God's words back to me, it's my choice to make time for God in the early part of my day.

God's truth is found in His holy and inspired words.  My pastor spoke of what a difference this made in his life.  And that was enough to make me want it too.  

I have found that the more I spend time with God, the more I need to hear from Him on everything.  It has made a profound difference in my understanding.  So here's the part where I tell you there have been a lot of lies that  have been uncovered from my past that God has revealed to my heart and I am now processing.  I am "burning plows" so to speak and getting rid of those lies, and letting God's healing grace take me to my new spiritual places of freedom.  

My embedded lies are met with this:  

"If we claim to have fellowship with him yet walk in the darkness; we lie and do not live by the truth.  But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all sin."  1 John 1: 5-6 

Away in His word places...I find light.  I find freedom.  I find escape from this world that weighs me down.  I find His grace that transforms.  The distance is bridged from my heart to His.  I find I can just be me.  I find His truth to be liberating.  I find promises for my future and for my today. I find God.  And as I find God, he takes me by the hand and shows me His way.  He is the Way, the Truth, my Life.

I find He is with me even when my heart is succumbed to lies of this world.  I find mercy to match every lie I have swallowed.  I find Him waiting with open arms to receive.  When I find His truth, I find a deep inner peace.  I find a Lifeline.  I cling to His love as He changes me.  I find His light that illuminates into those horrible lies and dispels them.  I find what my raw emotions are crying for.  I find calmness for my last nerve.  I find a bridge over these trouble filled waters of my soul.   

Your love is the reason I am free.
I am running to you.
You are all I need.
You are the only for me.
Your Love is Alive and living in me.

There has been a lot of changes that have come from this journey, worth the start, worth the effort, and I have found so much worth it makes my heart crumble.  
There is no way I am leaving now.

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