My momma said there'd be days like this

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It's been swirling in my heart lately.  A black cloud of disappointment.  And I don't know why.  And even after I pleaded God's mercies to put feet to my prayers.  Silence.  

"Stay here.  Stay near."

I have to wonder if that is how the children of Israel felt, when they struck out in obedience and didn't know what the next day would hold.  What they had just witnessed was a huge miracle of the waters parting by the very breath of God.  

Their true deliverance from their slavery, their oppressive bondage, had just exploded behind them.  Then their dreams of freedom fell flat upon the banks of the other side, days after their dusty dance across the Red Sea.

From their perspective they were clinging to what the hope words of their leader Moses, lead by the hand of God.  Doubts and despair soon settled into their hearts and mind.  The grumbles and groans were heard by many, and by the Most Holy ears.  It's so true that negative speech spreads quicker than one positive word.

Sometimes, we don't see our ways to freedom when we are surrounded by the enemy's shadows of doubt.  I have to wonder if there wasn't one person who thought deliverance into God's hope-filled promise would have looked a little different or a little grander at the time.

Surely there was one doubter among the clan.  Just one or two?

I have come to understand in our journey of faith, when we trust and obey what God has asked us to do, the enemy is lurking at our thresholds throwing stones of doubt our way to test our hope-resolve and builds barriers that cause us to stumble along the way.

That's where God's promises ring true and faithful.  My momma told me there would be days like this.  I've had to go back to what I know and re-establish my hope-filled promise that God originally gave me that fuels my dream.  I have to go back to my "why".   

Every dream is fueled by a personal festering of a "why-I-do-this".  

But....it's supposed to be easy or come more natural ...right?  And of course, it will look exactly what we think it should!  I have found out these are crafty statements the enemy hisses at you to make you give up when the going gets tough.  Or when it feels like you are the only one who cares about your dreams.   

Oh our wayward minds, we're so silly when we try to put our finite understanding, on God's incredible and infinite mind.  His will is unmovable when it comes to His plans for us.  He's got that all planned out fabulously fine without our measly little details we try to add to it.  He doesn't need our input.

The Israelites didn't see their freedom until God took them a few more legs into their journey of trust.

There are days when my faith journey looks the same doubt-filled path.  Did I do the right thing?  Did I strike out at the right time?  Did I really hear from God right?

My obedience tells me yes.  Obedience at any and every time is right when you are following God.  So in those days when I question my motives I remind myself of my why and that gives me a renewed hope. I feel better prepared now.  I have learned that true hope delights our Father. Disappointment rips away at our faith, so cling to what you know about God, and there you will find your true hope. 

Hebrews 10:23  "Let us hold tightly without wavering to the hope we affirm, for God can be trusted to keep his promise." (NLT)

In His affection for you, you have His security. All is not lost, but only continuing. Hold to His words for everything else shifts and changes, but His word is firm. It is a rock that shall not be moved and is my firm place to stand. Live in the hope that we have in Christ and it will bring joy to your heart, enough to occupy your worrisome thoughts. Our Father's hope and love keeps us in His peace and rest.

Romans 5:5 "And this hope will not lead to disappointment. For we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love."  (NLT)

The heat of the desert

This is actually a re-post from a year ago.  It seemed appropriate for what I am going through right now.  There are times you feel the heat of a desert.  Have you ever felt that way?

From my prayer journal...
"I yearn for your answers God.  You know my prayers, my hopes, dreams and desires. I long for Your promises to be complete. Sometimes the waiting period seems unbearable.  God your plan seems cloudy or unclear. The waiting seems excruciatingly endless."

Perhaps your desire is for your broken marriage to be restored, your rebellious teenager to return home or a family member's health to be healed. Maybe you are waiting for the right person to be your soul mate.  You wait. You pray. You wait some more.

The Bible is full of people who waited. God's people wait.  Godly people like Abraham and Sarah waited.  They had to wait till they were old to have their first child. Joseph was sold as a slave by his own brothers, only to end up in prison for years before his promise of authority became a reality in his life. Why did God make them wait? Why does God allow us to wait?

There can be long periods of waiting for us all in our different situations and circumstances. And in those waiting times our faith is put to the test. I know I get impatient and sometimes doubt. However, I am learning, that in the waiting, there is joy in this journey. Yes, it's possible to be happy in this waiting room we are in.  While waiting I am learning more about who God is.

Ps. 119:123-124, "My eyes strain to see your deliverance, to see the truth of your promise fulfilled. I am your servant; deal with me in unfailing love, and teach me your principles."

I must have blind faith in His time.

My need to wait overrides my need to understand.
My need to control takes a back seat to His Sovereignty.
My need to understand is overshadowed by His peace.
My need to feel complete is waived as He weaves a beautiful tapestry.  
As my eyes strain to see His promise, I have hope and joy as I wait to see His plans unfold. My raw dependence on His strength carries me through.

Dear God... perfect your faith in me no matter...how long it takes.   Your promises are perfect, so that means that you can only bring your Perfection to each promise.

Have you had to wait on God for a specific answer to prayer?  What did you learn in your waiting?

Two words that matter

You matter.

If we could ever grasp the depth of God's love, we would never question His love for us.

More importantly you matter to God.  Yes, He cares that much, and He has told us so.

How do I know?

Because I stand at the empty tomb opening and it glows with new life.  His love rushes in and resurrects my sometimes cold faith and gives it hope again.

I can feel the glow of Easter morning still shining in my heart and in my soul.

I can hear Him say..."you...yes...you my child, YOU matter to me.  I sent my Son to prove it."

No one else has kept a promise like what Easter morning brings.  I can put  my faith and trust in the only One who would.

In the One, true God who thinks that much about me and about you.

Yes, I matter.  And you matter.

Never doubt that, even if you don't feel it.  You do matter.  Believe it.

God says so as the empty tomb glows.

Messy Lessons from a Pineapple

There it was... in the middle of my kitchen floor...a sticky puddle of pineapple juice. It was the first thing I saw on that Sunday morning as I was making my coffee before church. One look was all it took to send me into an emotional tailspin. 

"Things will never be the same....will they God?!" 

I know what you are thinking, it's just a puddle of juice....come on.....spills happen. Yes, that's true. But there was more than just a pool of yellow colored sugary syrup that was at the feet of the refrigerator. There was a God-lesson floating there. 

The spill was an accident. I'm still blaming it on Macon, the cat. There was a reason this sent me into a ball of emotions....it was a huge mess.  When I saw the collection of the sticky liquid, this pineapple puddle pointed out that some familiar circumstances had changed. It was a pitiful reminder of what has been lost and there was a most definite need for clean up.   

In moments, I was on my knees swabbing the free flowing fluid. I was also in the perfect position for God to delicately dispense His limitless grace. As I wiped the floor, He gently wiped my heart with His blessed promise. I needed to let go of the way things have been. And instead believe that His grace is perfect in my weakness.  God has trusted my heart with these grace-laced days-of-waiting, in spite of all my unanswered why-questions.  I must cling to the promise he has given me instead of throwing in the towel when days gets hard, especially when I don't see his plan or feel his purpose in this trusting state of faith. 

As I was leaning to clean, God reassured me that His promise was still positioned and ready. His promise is His word and that is enough. Today is a new and different page in this God story. The promise is still on its way, and by faith, God has portioned this puddle. My tears have been replaced by peace. Prayer dries up pools of fear. Trust in Him calms the raging whys. Restoration and healing are waiting in the fringes. 

2 Corinthians 12:9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. 

What whys do you struggle with? What whys do you need to let go of?

Desert Days

We all have specific seasons that we journey through. Mine seems to be one of dryness... like a desert.  Have you ever felt that way?  


From my prayer journal...


"I yearn for your answers God.  You know my prayers, my hopes, dreams and desires. I long for Your promises to be complete. Sometimes the waiting period seems unbearable.  God your will seems cloudy or unclear. The waiting seems excruciatingly endless."


Perhaps your desire is for your broken marriage to be restored, your rebellious teenager to return or a family member's health to be healed. Maybe you are waiting for the right person to be your soul mate.  You wait. You pray. You wait some more.


The Bible is full of people who waited. Godly people like Abraham and Sarah waited. They had to wait till they were old to have their first child. Joseph was sold as a slave by his own brothers, only to end up in prison for years before his promise of authority became a reality in his life. Why did God make them wait? Why does God allow us to wait?


There can be long periods of waiting for us all in our different situations and circumstances. And in those waiting times our faith is put to the test. I know I get impatient and sometimes doubt. However, I am learning, that in the waiting, there is joy in this journey. Yes, it's possible to be happy in this waiting room we are in.  While waiting I am learning more about who God is.  


Ps. 119:123-124, "My eyes strain to see your deliverance, to see the truth of your promise fulfilled. I am your servant; deal with me in unfailing love, and teach me your principles."


One day in frustration I actually cried out loud to God..."I am out of prayers!"  What I really meant was I am out of words.  I have prayed circles around some of my concerns. I know that God has heard me, and as I dried my tears, my course of action was clear.  

I must have blind faith in His time.  

My need to wait overrides my need to understand.

My need to control takes a back seat to His omnipotence.  

My need to understand is overshadowed by His peace.

My next step is illuminated as I surrender to full trust.

My need to feel complete is waived as He weaves a beautiful tapestry.    

As my eyes strain to see His promise, I have hope and joy as I wait to see His plans unfold. My raw dependence on His strength carries me through. 

Dear God... perfect your faith in me no matter...how long it takes.  

Have you had to wait on God for a specific answer to prayer?  What did you learn in your waiting?