Painted Ponies

Painted Ponies

I love fall and this county fair time of year.  It's a tradition with my daughter and I that we make the annual trek, even though we both know we won't see anything new.  We arrived at the fairgrounds and we were greeted with the usual hustle and bustle.  We looked and laughed at the entries.  We like to judge them ourselves.  If I were a fair judge, would hand out different awards and ribbons to the most precious of entries.  We saw livestock and showpieces and those who had tendered their care.  We saw it all and gave our opinions to each other.

We even walked carnival row and allowed the barkers to shout.  "Come here...it's only a dollar!" for whatever game they were selling.  I never bought into those games.  We shared the traditional funnel cake treat.  Oh...those are so deliciously bad for you.  We judged ourselves for taking part in that fare.

With powdered sugar still on my face, I looked up to see the most striking exhibit.  It was a carnival worker at the kids merry-go-round.  The painted ponies were spinning fast but my gaze stopped and locked onto one the workers.  She was very overweight.  She had just gotten her a plate of some kind of cheesy-mounded-goodness with the biggest thermos mug-full of Mountain Dew a Quick Trip store could sell.  She knelt down on the dry ground at the edge of her work space to eat.  I had to look away.  

But then I looked back and immediately tears started to stream.  God spoke to my heart in that moment and said..."See what happens when you open your life to food idols?"  Ouch!  He reminded me that I had slowly shifted away in my obedience of eating right and I had let food be more important than it should have been.  And as the painted pony worker powered down her unhealthy meal, God painted a warning that I will always remember.  

Many plates later....

Oh my wayward heart.....God once again brought this whole scene back to my mind, and today I have to tell you that I have fallen under the subtle romance of food...again.  I have taken a ride on a painted pony on the unhealthy merry-go-round of food.  I am ashamed to write this but it's true.  And maybe this is where the healing begins.  Again.  I can only say that I have allowed it for comfort and pleasure.  

Now I am judging myself.  I tend to easily dismiss my own food sin.  And when I talk about some "dark" places in my heart...food is always there lurking in the corners leaving crumbs of desires.  Can I just tell you now that I've opened the door to allow God's love and light to enter in?  

Yes, this really goes that deep for me.  

I am tired of riding this spinning painted-pony ride, up and down, on this merry-go-round of health and fitness.  No more barely gripping on to the good benefits of eating right just sometimes.   I guess you could call this my "thorn". 

I want to start caring again.  

"Put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature: sexual immorality, impurity, lust evil desires and greed, which is idolatry. You used to walk in these ways, in the life you once lived.  But now you must rid yourselves of all such things as these...from your lips."  Colossians 3:5, 7-8

There is freedom in your discovery of whatever sin or thorn you might have in your life.   Is there anything that causes you to slowly spin away from God?  Is there something you want to ignore and dismiss because it's not that bad?

Do you know that God wants so much more for us?  

What I have found in my declaration of my weakness is my need for more dependence on God.  In my dependence on God, comes the of independence of whatever sin is weighing me down.  That's freedom at it's finest.  That's God at work, and that's my best life off of sin's painted-pony-merry-go-rounds.  

What sin do you need to let go of?  I've told you one of mine...

"A Place For Sinners, Not a Museum For Good People"

Thorny places

I liked the slogan of the church as soon as I saw it the Sunday service notes.  We settled into worship and it was obvious right away that the worship leader had spent some time with Jesus.  He worshiped too.

When it came time for the message, the pastor shared the exact same verse I had just read that morning.  I thought to myself...wow..that's cool!  Paul's writings have long stirred me ..and still do.  The more I understand the depth of Paul's circumstances in which he did most of his writing, the bigger fan I am of his style.  If anyone needed mercy, Paul did.   

The pastor shared about Paul's weakness with the thorn in his life.  Paul never mentions exactly what it was that caused him pain or irritation.  But in 2 Corinthians 12:7 - 10, Paul shares.....

"Because of the extravagance of those revelations, and so I wouldn't get a big head, I was given the gift of a handicap to keep me in constant touch with my limitations. Satan's angel did his best to get me down; what he in fact did was push me to my knees. No danger then of walking around high and mighty! At first I didn't think of it as a gift, and begged God to remove it. Three times I did that..."

And how did God answer Paul's cries for thorn-removal?  God left it right where it was planted deep in Paul's soul.  God's answer came in the form of mercy...

"My grace is enough; it's all you need. 

My strength comes into its own in your weakness. "

Did you get that?  Please re-read ...

I have a thorn...we all do..

Whatever your "thorn" is right now...your answer is God's grace.  Whatever you feel weak in...God's strength will come in and make it strong.  Struggling with a failed attempt?  God meets that with His strength and grace.  Feeling like you can't go on another day?  God won't leave you lacking when you ask Him for His grace.  Grace is complete and fills in all the cracks.

Wait...you say you have something that is impossible to get past?  

Your circumstances are ruined for all of time?  

You have crossed the line this time and there is no going back?

  

You have a fear the size of a  professional football field lodged in your throat and you can't see God's work for the giant crocodile tears that are constantly in your eyes and heart?

Yeah...I know...me too.

When I heard God's answer to my weakness, how it was simple and enough, I was a bawling mess of flesh in the pew on that Sunday.  

Really God...how could it be that simple?  How?

"My grace is enough; it's all you need. 

My strength comes into its own in your weakness. 

I am your portion and in YOUR weakness, I will use YOU..."

Talk about a waterfall of grace...gushing into my heart.  Wow..

The pastor's message was God's cheerleader encouragement that I needed to kick my football field sized fear-filled dream to the goalpost and say "touchdown".  Well...honestly...I have a hard head so..it will take a couple more reviews of the playbook to fully sink in.

But it was definitely a direct word from my God who knows my fear and has teamed it up with His grace and strength.  I know that he wrote the playbook, so there is no contest to consider.  He has all I need to make what He has asked me to do complete and enough.  

To me it's a God-sized challenge, but all I need to do is suit-up.  

When I am faint from practice, I will be met with enough promised grace.  

When I am frustrated beyond words, His cheers will shout hope to continue.

When I bring my "I-can't-attitude" to the field, He will meet me with A-string of "I-cans!"

When I am faint from not getting it right, He will bring me strength in my weakness.

When I am met with the empty blinking white screen ...He will give me all I need.  

Not just enough, but all that I need.  

God knows my needs better than anyone.  As I swallow hard and move forward I know, even my weakest and most broken places, those are even valuable to God.  It's in those thorny-hard-to-figure-out-the-answer places that he will bring His mercy.  I can trust Him to provide the grace and strength he has promised as He sees fit.  He's not running out of grace-laced-plays yet as I submit to His plan.  Wow....  

So...you want to know the name of the church?  Mercy Church, Sioux Falls, South Dakota.